THE MISSION STATEMENT
1) All babies must be fed.
2) My mission is to...
tie up a lot of women,
make a lot of money so I can keep my phoney-baloney job,
help my girlfriend, Lorelei,
hunt down pirates and if not put them out of business, to at least expose them for the noxious cancer they are,
and to fight a neverending battle for truth, justice and the Milky Way.
3) Unless or until someone points out that this is a pompous and egotistical intention, it is also my unofficial mission to be the self-appointed guardian angel of the bondage industry in the San Fernando Valley.